Reluctant Retiree

What does it mean to empathize with another person’s struggles or problems? Does it mean that we simply listen and understand? Does it mean that we just agree that they are having difficulties? Can we invest in the other person’s life more than that?

One dictionary defines “empathize” as to understand and share the feelings of another. That definition is too vague to satisfy me. Another dictionary defines “empathy” as the ability to sense other people’s emotions, coupled with the ability to imagine what someone else might be thinking or feeling. Even that definition doesn’t go far enough for me. Simply sensing and imagining is not deep enough to truly empathize with someone’s distress.

To empathize you need to be able to put yourself mentally and emotionally in the place of another’s troubles. You’ve got to be able to feel what the other person is feeling and why it is a problem for them.

God empathizes with our struggles and problems. He can do this because Jesus became flesh and suffered all our weaknesses and temptations. He knows what it feels like to be rejected. He knows what it is like to be publicly shamed. He knows how it hurts to be betrayed. In fact, He suffered these things and more to a far greater degree than we ever will. Psalm 56:8 says, “You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? ” God not only cares about our struggles, but He keeps our tears in a bottle, counts our hurts and records them in His book. Anything that hurts us, gives Him pain. That is an empathetic God that I can trust with my life.

Most of the time I eat healthy. I generally eat a lot of fruits and vegetables. I have stayed away from my old habits of eating burgers and fries for years now. However, occasionally the lure of sweets or junk food is just too strong. Then I indulge myself in strawberry sundaes or brownies.

Food treats are not the only things that tempt us to go off the straight and narrow way. The pursuits of money, fame, lust, and selfish desires can pull us away from where we intended to go.

I Peter 3:10-11 gives us instructions for living well. It says, “For whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.” Whether we give our lives to doing good or to doing evil has a direct impact upon the quality of our lives. We make the choice. What will your choice be?

Why do we follow celebrities so closely? Do we expect some of their charm, good looks, riches, or good fortune to rub off onto us? Do we imagine ourselves in their place? Do we compare ourselves to them and think that we deserve what they have?

Why do we admire celebrities? Is what they possess really what we want or should desire? Are they even really happy or satisfied? I am sure that many celebrities are happy, but I don’t see many that appear satisfied. They always seem to want more attention, achievement, money, etc.

We need to be careful who we admire and why. III John verse 11 says, “Beloved, do not imitate evil but imitate good. Whoever does good is from God; whoever does evil has not seen God. ” Don’t admire celebrities for what they have, but rather consider those who do good works.

I have been pleasantly surprised lately at how often people are saying “thank you! ” Store clerks, restaurant workers, and service personnel seem to go out of their way to offer thanks. I’ve got to say, that as a patron of these businesses, it makes me feel appreciated and brings a smile to my face.

Most parents train their children at a young age to say thanks when they receive a gift. We don’t always instruct them to give thanks when somebody does something nice for them.

Somehow as we get older we seem to get out of the habit of giving thanks. Perhaps we just get busy and forget to be grateful at the time. Maybe it’s because we expect others to do good to us.

Our God is a good God. He is constantly giving us good things that we don’t deserve. That is called grace. By His grace He saves us from our sins. By His grace He gives us new life. By His grace He calls us His children. He expects us to respond with gratitude. Psalm 50:23 says, “The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me; to the one who orders his way rightly I will show the salvation of God! ” An old song says, “Count your blessings, name them one by one! ” We should take time to thank God for each of the blessings He gives.

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth…Then God said, “Let there be light”; and there was light. God saw that the light was good; and God separated the light from the darkness. God called the light day,and the darkness He called night.” Genesis 1:1, 3-4

Yesterday was cloudy all day and it snowed most of the day. So when I saw the sun this morning, it was glorious. Reflecting the sunlight, the snow made everything bright and beautiful.

One of the ways that the Bible describes God is to say that He is light. This describes His holiness. It goes on to say that His light shatters the darkness, destroying evil.

When we believe in Jesus, God’s Son, God puts His light in us. We are then called to walk in the light of His Word. I John 1:5-7 says, “This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth; but if we walk in the Light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin.” Light is essential to life. God’s Light is essential to knowing and living in the truth.

Most every day we have received snow, it seems for weeks now. It makes the trees and landscape beautiful. It makes the roads and parking lots a disaster. Snow turns into a muddy mush where trampled by a number of cars. This mush attaches itself to your vehicle. Most of the cars in this area look like they have been driven off road through mud.

If we are not careful, we can allow ungodly stains to attach themselves to us as we roll through life, much like the muddy mush attaches to our cars. Celebrities and the rich can unduly influence our desires as we admire their public lives and private indulgences. Marketing can cause us to desire material things. Friends can lead us into unhealthy lifestyles.

James 1:27 warns us to remain unstained by the world; “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. ” As James mentions, one way to keep unstained from the world is to help others who are less fortunate than we are. Also, we need to periodically evaluate the things which we allow to influence us.

Walking outside at this time of year can be dangerous. Sometimes I walk in fresh snow thinking that my footing will be secure, only to find ice beneath. The ice is not only slippery but is uneven causing my ankle to turn precariously. Recently I made a step in the snow that half landed on concrete and half into an adjoining hole. I turned my ankle worse than I can ever recall doing before. Thankfully I did not sprain or break my ankle.

I walk through life like that. Most of the time I take careful calculated steps. But often I step where I shouldn’t and fall spiritually, emotionally, or relational. Sometimes I make ill-advised intentional steps into danger or risk.

Hebrews 4:16 gives me instructions for getting back up in either of these cases. It says, “Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. ” God stands ready to forgive me when I do wrong and grace to do good.

I walk about 10 miles each morning. Until the weather turned bad the last couple weeks, I was able to vary my route from day to day. Now I have to be content to walk around the shopping center across the street. Their walkways and parking lot are generally plowed.

This morning I noticed something about my footprints in the snow. On the fourth time around the center I could see that I was not consistent in where I stepped. Sometimes I would veer off to the left and sometimes I would veer to the right. I had no easy explanation as to why I didn’t keep walking straight. Did I see something interesting to the left and I was drawn that direction. Perhaps I saw danger (i.e. a car) approaching and veered right.

That got me thinking about the footprints we leave in life. Are we always heading straight to our goals, or do we veer right or left unintentionally at times? Does advertising or the media sway our interest and take us off course? Furthermore, would we want anyone to follow our footprints?

The writer of Hebrews gives us the solution when he writes, “Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us,and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of faith. ” The key to walking straight in life is to fix our eyes on Jesus, getting rid of the things that make us stumble or get off track. Walking straight to Jesus lays down footprints that we would be happy that others should follow.

Several years ago a friend and I traveled to a hill village in Nepal. To get to the village, we took a bus a couple hours up the hill until the road became unpassable for the bus. Then we got in the back of a construction truck along with 20 other people. We took the truck as far as it could go, then hiked for a couple hours. We were in the village a couple days helping some friends.

Then it began to rain and we decided we had to leave. So my friend and I began to walk down the hillside with several villagers. That’s when the rain became a downpour. It was coming down in sheets. Of course, that made it impossible for even the construction truck to travel on the muddy path. So we had to walk all the way down to where we caught the bus to go up the hill. It took us five to six hours.

The thick mud is what made it difficult. One time I jumped down a small ledge onto the road and sunk into the mud up to my knees. Another time I was walking on the road and suddenly slipped off the hillside. Fortunately, it was a hillside terraced for the growing of rice. I fell about six feet but landed on my feet. Eventually we made it down the hill and home.

I tell this story to say that I can relate to the psalmist who wrote Psalm 40:1-3. “I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord. “

Sometimes we can get stuck in miry clay of emotions or wrong thinking. Stresses and pressures come and we can’t find our way out. At those times we need to call upon God. He alone can pull us out of these pits. Then He will place us firmly on the solid ground of His love and grace.

The television show, American Idol, sought to find and promote the next big musical star. A number of other shows attempt to do the same thing. Other reality shows seek the ultimate survivor, amazing racer, or ninja. If that’s not enough promotional hype, there are the reality shows covering the lives of famous or wannabe famous people. Beyond that, of course, is the shameless self promotional social media stars.

You would think that an advanced culture, like our own, would move past setting up idols for worship. Idol worship is the stuff of ancient cultures. Or is it? Not only are we a culture who worship and adore our celebrities, but we have other idols as well. Just look around and you find people with their heads bowed to their cellphone. How much time do we give to these devices and what sacrifices do we make for them? Just this morning, I was taking my morning walk around the neighborhood shopping center, when I stopped to consider our idol of materialism. Within hours hundreds, if not thousands, of people would enter this temple of materialism to sacrifice their money at the altar.

In Acts chapter 17, Paul is alone in the city of Athens. He takes a walk and notices a great number of idols. Verse 16 says, “Now while Paul was waiting for them at Athens, his spirit was provoked within him as he saw that the city was full of idols.” Not only does idol worship disturb a first century apostle, it should disturb us. God hates idol worship because it causes us to go after evil, anything that doesn’t honor the true God. My heart is stirred when I see people succumb to evil. I don’t get mad at them. Instead I feel bad for them. God has such great things in store for them, if they will only turn to Him.