Reluctant Retiree

Before my operation the other day, they had to shave my chest and back. Since I am pretty hairy, the nurse wasn’t too excited about it.

She wasn’t thrilled, but neither was I. I knew that I was going to pay in the coming days. The resultant itch and skin irritation has set in. Lotion helps but clothes still rub and aggravate the itch. It is always there.

The famous scientist Pascal said that we all have a God shaped vacuum inside. I liken this to a bad itch. We do many things to fill the vacuum, or get rid of the itch. We try acquiring riches and things to fill the void, but they don’t satisfy. Some try alcohol or drugs but find themselves with a bigger whole. Others try sex to fill the void but just add to their unease with bigger problems.

How can the vacuum be filled? Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father but through me.” The vacuum can only be filled by believing in Jesus.

Yesterday I was in the hospital to have a cardiac ablation. This was to correct a periodic rapid heartbeat. The procedure starts with the doctor inserting a camera into a vein to see where the problem is. Then they inject something into you to start a rapid heartbeat to help detect the electrical shortcircuit. Unfortunately, my heart kept self-correcting so they couldn’t find the problem area.

Failing that, they put a loop recorder under my skin near the heart. The idea is that this recorder will detect and report any abnormal heartbeats, helping the doctor determine the problem and then correct it.

All that is greast and I am amazed at the technology. However, I wonder why this technology has not been developed for other areas of our lives.

Why isn’t there a relationship loop recorder that identifies and reports internally the dumb things I say or do that hurt relationships? Then I could try to correct these mistakes and make amends. How about a financial loop recorder that detects potentally harmful financial mistakes before they are made? What about an internal lie detector to warn me about potential lies I am getting ready to speak?

Why can’t I find a spiritual loop recorder that will keep me from making wrong choices and taking me on a path from from where I want to go? Ah but God has given us one of those spiritual loop recorders. It is called the Word of God, the Bible. II Timothy 3:16-17 says, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.” There you have it, God’s true spiritual loop recorder.

Where I live, the grass is already turning brown and leaves are already falling off trees. It seems awfuly early to me and it is still hot outside.

In some ways this is just the natural cycle of things. It happens every year. In other ways it strikes me how easily life turns to death. Even things that seem to be truly healthy can waste away quickly.

Jesus spoke about how this cycle can actually be reversed. His illustration was about the mustard seed. He said unless a seed is placed in the ground and dies it cannot bear fruit. Later he declared that unless you are born again you cannot see the kingdom of God.

Peter wrote about this new birth when he wrote, “since you have been born again, not of perishable seed but of imperishable, through the living and abiding word of God.” I Peter 1:23. So unless we are willing to give our lives completely to Jesus, we cannot obtain new life that is imperishable.

It has always intrigued me to watch the political conventions, hear the grandiose claims, and the see the polls reflect public opinion. Every four years after the first convention that party sees a significant increase in public approval. That higher ranking lasts until the other party’s convention and public approval swings the other way. So despite the millions of dollars spent to hold these conventions the net change in public approval is minimal.

Speeches at both conventions seem true and right. They espouse positive ideals and generate enthusiasm for their parties. High accolades come from some reviewers while others are highly critical. Strong emotions often distort the original messages and the reviews. Who’s right?

Both and neither! All have some ideas that are true and some statements that are not true. Why?

I think it is because they are drawing from the wrong sources. They are drawing from their own biases and limited understanding. So sometimes they are right, at least partially, and sometimes they are wrong, usually substantially.

We’ve got to go back to the source of knowledge and understanding. Proverbs 1:7 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.” God is the source of true wisdom and knowledge.

I have tripped over raised sidewalks three times recently. One time I fell onto grass and was unhurt. The other two times I fell onto the sidewalk and skinned myself up quite a bit. Obviously I need to pay more attention to my steps.

My life has been a series of twists and turns. Sometimes the path is smooth and at other times the ground is uneven, requiring much care. Sometimes there are many roads to choose from and I struggle with the choices.

How do we know where to take the next step? Sometimes we just have to wait for direction. Other times I have to take one step forward to be able to see the next step. How we make these choices is important?

It always works out best for me if first I look for guidance in God’s Word, the Bible. While it may not specifically address my choice, it will always speak to how I make the choice and on what basis I should choose. That gives me confidence to make the right choices.

Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”

Mood rings were popular many years ago. The rings supposedly revealed your mood by displaying different colors. The movie “Inside Out” took the idea a little further by showing various feelings in different colors as they battled for control of a person.

I have often thought that people should dress in different uniforms according to their moods. It would be helpful for interpersonal relationships. We would instantly know to tread lightly with the person dressed in red, because they are angry. If they are in green we would know that they are envious, and so on. For those of us who are clueless, at times, this kind of obvious help would make things much easier.

Unfortunately these signals are not available to us. So how do we know how to interact on a case by case basis. There is one relationship tool that always works, selfless love. If we seek to give selfless love in all relationships, these relationships will grow into things of beauty.

I Peter 4:9 says, “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.”

Do you notice what is going on around you? I’m not talking about the big stuff, like a pandemic and the election. I am talking about the even bigger stuff, although it may seem routine and insignificant.

Did you notice the sunrise with its amazing colors this morning? Did you hear the birds chirping, each with their own special melody? Did you watch the squirrels doing their dances up the trees or over the grass? How about the unbridled joy of a small child jumping up and down in excitement over some small thing? Did you get to see the reflection of trees on a glassy lake in the early morning?

For once, I did see and notice all those things today. I’ve got to tell you that these things lifted my spirit and made me smile. They took my mind off the so called “big things” and took to a place of quiet and joy. They led me to good thoughts and thanksgiving for all I have been given.

Romans 1:19-20 says “For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made.” Take a moment to look around and see what you can see to lift you up to a higher level.

When I was younger, my mom worked a full-time job to support the family. She would then clean the whole house on Saturday. She did that by moving every piece of furniture so she could vacuum and clean where it had been. As a result, our house interior looked different every week. This was the source of the first argument my wife and I had. I wanted to move each piece of furniture to a new place each week. Having not grown up in the same environment as me, and being more sane than me, my wife did not want to rearrange furniture every week. I got over it.

In addition to frequently moving furniture, my mother wanted to paint the house interior about every other year. Of course, that meant the rest of us would do the painting. I grew pretty tired of this. I used to tell her that the livingroom used to be 10 feet by 13 feet, but now it was 8 feet by 10 feet, due to all the paint on the walls. I am not sure why she wanted the walls painted so frequently but I think it had to do with my dad’s smoking habit. She probably wanted to cover up the smoke stains and smell.

Isn’t that what we do with the bad parts of our character? Rather than dealing with and correcting our weaknesses, we try to cover them up. Jesus chided the Pharisees for being more concerned with appearances than with their hearts and souls.

Frankly I have never been too successful in trying to clean up my attitudes and behaviors in my own willpower. Fortunately, I have found that the Holy Spirit in conjunction with the Word of God can transform my character. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Why not let the Spirit clean house in your life?

On every personality test I have taken over the years, I have always been rated as an introvert. In fact, my introvert ranking is as strongly in that category as you can get.

Being an introvert does not mean that I don’t like people. In fact, I do like people. It is just that people draw energy out of me, while extroverts gain energy when they are with people.

Our culture does not understand or value introverts. We expect people to be outgoing and excited about every opportunity to party with others. By contrast I prefer interaction with a smaller number of people, or preferably one on one discussions. Sometimes I will decline an invitation to an event, preferring to be alone. If my wife and I have spent several days in a row with groups of people, she knows that I will need a break.

So, it’s not that I don’t like people, it’s just that I prefer them in smaller doses. Jesus knew the need to withdraw from people at times. He taught the thousands, but then withdrew to teach the twelve or to pray in solitary.

I find it interesting that the Old Testament law was to love your neighbor as yourself. But Jesus updated this law with a new commandment. “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” The new commandment has a higher standard for love. Now we are to love as Jesus loved not just as we love ourselves. Introvert or extrovert, we are to love as Jesus loves us. Introvert or extrovert, Jesus loves with an abounding, steadfast and eternal love.

God has been working on me in the area of gratitude. A number of physical infirmities have come my way recently. It’s is not so much that I have been grumbling and complaining about these things, it is more that I have taken my eyes of the good things God is giving me.

It is so easy to become so absorbed in momentary difficulties that we miss God’s blessings. Let me give you an example. In 2001 I was enjoying an effective ministry in Nepal. God was doing amazing things and I was seeing him work through me and others. In the midst of this, I developed a pinch nerve in my neck that was very painful. We went to Singapore and I had surgery. I then had to wear a neck brace for several months. I didn’t care for either of those experiences. My attention was drawn to my ailments, forgetting many of the blessings I had received, like expert care and immediate pain relief.

I hadn’t bothered to thank God for these and other blessings. Then, as I was entering the doctor’s office for a follow-up exam, I held the door open for a tiny toddler and her parents. The toddler was also in a big brace and bandaged. I was immediately struck by how fortunate I was. I was an adult better equipped to handle my circumstances, by God’s grace, than this child. Also I wasn’t watching my child suffer as her parents were. God had given me the privilege of serving him and watching him move and bless others through me. I needed to be humbled and thank him for his many great and wonderful gifts.

Ephesians 1:17 says, “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” And I Thessalonians 5:18 says, “give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”